Thursday, October 22, 2009

Department of Justice Admits: Dems are TOO STUPID to Vote!

Kinston, NC (my own hometown!) recently voted to make their municipal elections nonpartisan.

The Obama Administration, in its great wisdom, has decided that the democratic process is heinously flawed in this case, and will not allow the town of 23,000 to implement the decision of the electorate.  Instead, the Wise and Good Obama Administration has demanded that in all future municipal elections in Kinston still have D and R and I and L and God-knows-what-all on the ballot.


Because, according to the Obama/Democratic Department of Justice, Democratic voters - particularly blacks - NEED to have the (D) on the ballot so they know whom to properly vote for!

Yes.  Democrats are TOO STUPID to know who to vote for without the (D) on the ballot.

While the Racist Obama Administration notes that, in its opinion, blacks are too dumb to vote, I would say that this is a symptom of the innate racism of the Democratic Party in the USA - revealed elsewhere in its penchant for affirmative action, where Democrats demonstrate openly their opinion that blacks and women cannot get jobs or advance in their careers without governmental coercion.

I don't think that blacks are too dumb to vote.  If Thomas Sowell and Walter Williams and Alan Keyes were the only folks voting, we'd have a pretty good government.

Rather, I am glad that a Democratic Department of Justice has finally admitted what I have been saying for years: DEMOCRATS are too stupid to vote!

Monday, October 12, 2009

Obama Wins!

It is now time for baseball writers and fans to begin to think about the years' Cy Young Award winner.  The Cy Young Award is, for the non-baseball literate, the award given to the pitcher who is theoretically the best for the year, or who alternately has the greatest positive impact on his team's success for the year.

Fans are debating who will win - there's a great case for Greinke (with an absolutely astounding 2.16 ERA - and that in the American League!) and I personally think Chris Carpenter (with 17 wins in 28 starts and a 2.24 ERA) are the best candidates.  But there is controversy.

For it seems that this year, those invited to vote for the Cy Young Award winners are not necessarily looking for who has accomplished most this season, but rather for that pitcher who shows the most promise.

Therefore, I am going out on a limb and predicting that Barack Hussein Hoover Pinnochio Muhammad bin Obama will win the Cy Young Award for 2009.

He has certainly been "pitching" since early 2008....

What?  You say he doesn't deserve the Cy Young Award?

Heck, he's done at least as much to deserve the Cy Young Award as he has to deserve the Nobel Prize.

While, I think, Obama would admit that he does not deserve to be mentioned in the same breath with Steve Carlton, Randy Johnson, Tom Seaver, Warren Spahn, and the great Sandy Koufax, nevertheless, his attempts to dismantle the American experiment will likely positively lead baseball into a new day typified by hope, change, and... uhhhhhhhh, well, maybe Europeans will have a chance to win the baseball gold medal in the Olympics hereafter?  That's gotta be worth something, right?

Baseball writers are being criticized for even considering Obama in a process that is being labeled both "premature" and "politically based."  However, one writer has stated, based on assurances of anonymity,

“We definitely feel that Obama has changed the international climate [of baseball] and contributed far more than any other candidate to fraternity among [baseball teams and leagues.  Besides, we are willing to give him time to work on that fastball.]  “It has happened many times in the past that the award has been used to encourage further achievement” [including the motivation to develop some serious mojo and maybe even work on that knuckleball a little].
While acknowledging that President Obama's pitching game has yet to produce many results, nevertheless certain baseball writers are hopeful that awarding him the Cy Young Award will help him to advance his agenda.

Venezuelan dictator Hugo Chavez, when asked whether Obama should be given this year's Cy Young Award, replied...

"What has Obama done to deserve this prize? The jury put store on his hope for a [killer fastball], forgetting his role in perpetuating [the financial fiasco that was the Montreal Expos], and his decision to install new [steroid factories] in [American League cities].  For the first time, we are witnessing an award with the nominee having done nothing to deserve it: rewarding someone for a wish that is very far from becoming reality."

Chavez then said that giving Barack the Cy Young award would be as stupid as rewarding a pitcher for promising that he would strike out 500 batters and win 50 games in a year.

A lot of insight that Chavez fellow has when it comes to the game of baseball.

Chavez added that to give Obama the Cy Young Award would be like awarding the Nobel prize to someone based on their desire to dialogue with terrorists and conducting an apology tour around the world.  Or maybe he didn't.  But that stuff about rewarding someone for wishes instead of reality he definitely said.